Most programmes or books try to guide us to find our way on our own.
What is the Philia Method?
Lesson Progress
0% Complete
Yoga, meditation, coaching, retreats… The list of ways and programmes, in which we are promised to “find ourselves” is long…
Responsibilities, overwhelm, showing up in the world. Life can feel pretty daunting at times. Knowing how to show up is key to a purposeful life and sometimes all that is missing is the right tool.
We belong to a new generation that is hungry to succeed in a sustainable way. However, sustainability now translates to more than just our workplaces. The lines are getting blurred and our personal lives become more and more intertwined with our work lives.
But where to start when browsing through all of the offered programs?
That is exactly the question we asked ourselves when things were not going according to plan (… and they hardly do. John Lennon said it, too).
Here are some very well known traditional approaches to go about “trying to find ourselves and our paths again”:
- Doing it on our own – the DIY Approach,
- Doing it with someone from your inner circle – your family and friends or
- Doing it with someone external like a mentor or a coach, for example.
Let’s walk through the most common options:
Do It Yourself
Openness & Honesty – The advantage
What we really love about this approach is that it allows us to be very open and honest with ourselves, as there is no one from the outside judging us for our thoughts and feelings. We can freely venture into unknown territory to explore new and deep levels of our selves.
The Philia Progress Report is a tool that we invented to include the advantages of introspection into the Philia Method.
Blindspots: Standing in our own way – The disadvantage
The problem with this approach is simply that we no not exist in silos and that we have blind spots that we are unaware of. Often these blind spots are the reason why we are stuck in the first place. So this means that we might struggle to establish enough distance to our problems to properly see and understand the underlying dynamics. We are often too involved. What is more, we don’t manage to hold ourselves accountable to sticking to goals that we set.
Inner Circle
Another important step we take is to speak to people in our immediate surroundings like a co-worker, a relative or friend.
Sustainability & Trust – The Advantage
What we love about this approach is that it is great to have someone to share our worries and fears with. With someone from our peer group, we have already established trust and comfort. Furthermore, a peer is most likely there for us over the long run, which creates the sustainability that is so important for change to take place. These are all principles that we included in the Philia Programme.
Peer to Peer Sessions are the cornerstone for the Philia Peer Coaching Process. As you can chose a person you have great rapport with you harness the advantages of accessing your inner circle.
Projection – The Disadvantage
While our peers most likely mean well, they have no direct experience or training as a coach. One of the major pitfalls is them projecting their own fears and boundaries onto us, as they are often bounded by their own expectations. So, they might have a clouded vision because of their own personal blueprints. In other words, speaking to those around us might cause more confusion and can potentially take us away from our inner voice, which means that we remain stuck.
Expert Advice
The last step often involves taking a life coach or seeking therapy.
Tools & Skills – The Advantage
A mentor and/or coach has learned specific tools to guide their clients. Guiding others is a particular skill, an art even, that needs to be acquired over a long period of time. These individuals, who professionally help others have long term experience to really understand the nuances of guiding another.
The development of expert skills is one of the core elements of the Philia Peer Coaching Programme. As you train the Philia Method weekly together you develop the skills needed to have regular conversations that are truly empowering. The peer coaching process can be practiced indefinitely once you master the technique with this course.
Limited Support & One-sidedness – The Disadvantage
Even the professional experience has its downsides. The coach is essentially a stranger to us, who helps us only temporary; often in exchange for a fee. The person cares because they are paid to care and when the time is up you are on your own again. Further, professional coaching can work on a particular goal in your life, yet due to its limited nature it is just not a sustainable way to reach all of the goals you set for yourself.
The Solution? The Philia Method!
The Philia Method: Peer Coaching
We have tried all of these options just explained ourselves and this made us curious: What if there was an alternative that is even more effective and, most importantly, more sustainable?
As none of the traditional ways towards growth and impact creation were 100 % satisfactory, we were wondering what this new approach there could be. We were looking for an alternative that would not leave us all to ourselves with our issues, but at the same time would not involve opening up temporarily to a complete stranger, who might soon vanish out of our lives again once the paid sessions are up.
We asked ourselves: Why not merge the best of the all worlds the trained skill of peer support rooted in effective communication on the one hand, paired with a universally applicable approach that can be implemented with the people closest to us on the other hand?
Philia allows you to fully open yourself like you would do on your own in the DIY approach and provides the trusted and sacred space you share with a close peer enhanced by the impactful skill of a trained professional such as a coach or mentor.
